That Sounds Like A Really Boring Story

18 Dec

I work a part-time job at a Big Box Retail Store. This time of year is, in the U.S. at least, the shittiest time to work retail. It’s like the county fair—people come out of the goddamn woodwork. People who call going shopping “going to town” and maybe, let’s say, they clip their nails in front of you while you explain that there is no such thing as a 5 gallon crockpot.

What’s worse than the hilljacks are the people that take Xmas shopping Very Seriously. I had to break it to an adult grown woman the other day that we didn’t have the Tinkerbell blanket she wanted and her words, precisely, were, “Well, that’s just the story of my life.”

That sounds like a pretty fucking boring story, lady. Get a hold of yourself, would you? You are defining the entirety of your life as the moment you couldn’t charge a rayon blanket made in China on your credit card.

I try not to make heavy-handed statements like that. I had a co-worker recently say, “I’ve been through shit” to me and honestly, guys? I wanted to break her nose.

I know we’re all keeping calm and carrying on, fighting our own personal battles, etc. But that’s just it, you guys. It’s personal. I would never dream of saying that out loud, and particularly not at work.

I do believe very deeply in the Internet Overshare, though, so I’ll say this. I am lucky. I was born a white woman in the first world. No one has ever tried to carve up my vagina and I have received health care, education, and general safety my entire life. I also grew up in poverty and other unpleasant situations. Statistically, I have every reason to be an addict, an abuser, abused.

I had the choice to get up and walk out the backdoor of my childhood. I made a choice not to do that. And each day, I make a choice to be better than the things I cannot control. I to go to my two jobs. I tend to my broken heart. And I am endlessly thrilled that I have those opportunities. Because I know what the alternative is. Awful, bizarre things have happened to me and will continue to happen to me, because of me, around me, whatever. But the fact remains that I am fortunate.

And if there’s a day that I cannot, just cannot, be grateful? I’m certainly going to keep my mouth shut until that day ends and surely I will greet the next day with a joyful heart.

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